Former pro athlete Spencer Conley diligently devising ways to bridge the gap between athlete-coaching relationships

Spencer Conley isn’t just widely known for delivering thought-provoking, gutchecking speeches to athletes from various walks of life.

More than anything, his reputation is such that he’s known for keeping it real, most notably when it comes to esteeming others and inspiring them to maximize their full potential.

Take, for instance, how Conley, a former professional athlete, spoke with such eloquence and authority and passion when, during an exclusive interview with Making Headline News, he shared some in-depth thoughts and viewpoints pertaining to a rather touchy, attention-grabbing subject — the sometimes dysfunctional relationships between student athletes and coaches.

In what essentially was a forthright dialogue, Conley spoke intensely about his displeasure with modern-day player-coach relationships, in large part because, according to him, coaches are held to a slew of restrictions when it comes to their job responsibilities.

“Coaching are stuck with just tying themselves to the talent,” Conley said. “They’re not allowed to teach the kids to become great individuals.”

For what it’s worth, Conley acknowledged, such a detrimental, downward issue was non-existent during his days as a student athlete.

So how to explain the present-day change?

As Conley insinuated, student athletes must know their place and, most importantly, so does the parents of these athletes.

“Parents allow coaches to coach, but they don’t want the discipline that go with it,” Conley explained.

Oddly enough, in some cases, race plays a role in the conflict involving parents and the coaches who are hired to motivate their children.

“There are some good white coaches out there who can’t say anything to the kids without being labeled a racist. “We’re not allowing authority figures to do their jobs. We reject them because we’re not being disciplined in the home.”

A native of New Jersey who has spent the better portion of his life in Texas, Conley is widely known as an Inspirational Speaker and Life Professor and is the founder of chief executive officer of Too Driven.

A notable, well-publicized career that has acquired a global presence, Conley is widely known as “Big Coach Con” and is a motivator who conveys a life-altering experience that always leaves the audience ready to believe and to better themselves, according to a spokesperson at www.toodriven.com.

Interesting enough, when it comes to player-coach relationships, Conley said his primary focus is to continue to be a voice of reason, or to devise ways to help parents and coaches bridge the gap that unfortunately is proving unprofitable for all parties involved.

When asked if he senses this ongoing downward trend is causing coaches to lose a generation, Conley quickly replied, “We’ve basically done that. The focus is to get on and save the next (generation). “Coaches have three phases: hired, fired, or retired. That’s anybody’s life. That’s a coaches life. Period. That’s the game, one of the three, and with those three, you need to walk in and walk out with those same standards.”

In support of Conley’s argument, several athletes and coaches have expressed support of his direct approach to an ongoing issue countless individuals in the athletic realm are reluctant to address.

“Spencer Conley’s influence on our players and coaches has been an invaluable asset to our football program, said Trey Sissom of the Travis Tigers. “His energy and enthusiasm are unmatched and his desire to see our program reach new heights has made such a lasting impression on our players and coaches that its importance cannot be measured and his message of seizing opportunities in spite of your circumstances has resonated with every one of our athletes. Spencer shows genuine love for our kids.”

Said Lance Botkins of Pearland Independent School District: “Big Spence inspires, motivates, and teaches every student. His passionate real life talk helps students take action towards a their own goals and aspirations. He gives me chills every time I hear him speak. He is the best and most passionate speaker I’ve ever heard.”

Said Justin Britt of the Seattle Seahawks: “Having Spencer involved in my corner brings me peace and clarity. I know we share the same vision of helping the youth learn and evolve for the greater good. We both know they are the future and all they need is a direction with leadership. Having him helps me evolve as a leader in my own way, the camps are pointless without the two of us. A program would only benefit and mostly by the attitudes changing with leadership amongst the group growing exponentially.”

“Spencer Conley is a master motivator,” said Darin Earley, President/Founder of Bridge Builders Network. “He has a unique ability to speak to the core passions that move young people to action. Simultaneously, he has a unique style that is both refreshing and inspiring.”

And to Conley’s uniquely distinct credit, he deems it essential to often speak out about his sometimes unorthodox style of coaching.

“I coached for 10 high school, in college, and at the pro ranks before my gift overwhelmed me to move on,” Conley explained. “Coaching prepared me for what I do now in so many ways. First off, there are many different personalities on a staff that you must gain an understanding of not always agreeing but understanding and respect. Then there are those you coach from many different backgrounds and upbringings. Understanding that allows me to speak directly to the cause the root of a problem versus the effects of a problem. Coach-mentoring encouraging is the foundation of my life. There’s such a long list of coaches who influenced my life while I played for some and I coached with some.”

Moreover, no one merely has had to tell Conley what state his life would be in if not for those with whom he crossed paths through athletics, especially coaching.

“My inspiration in motivating (athletes) comes from that prospective,” Conley explained. “The most influential coach in my life was Joel Smith, who coached me at Robert G. Cole High School and molded me the best he could along with the men I shared a locker room with. I would be dead or in jail if all the white coaches who coached me had to think about their job or be considered a racist every time I needed to be pushed or corrected. I’m simply speaking truth. Even though I’m dyslexic, I was coached through it. My condition had nothing to do with integrity. I can be dyslexic. Being a punk… that’s a choice. Coaches should keep coaching and don’t allow parents, critics naysayers and couch quarterbacks to cause them to lose their passion. They ought to remember why they all got into coaching and should go out the same way. Coach Pete Gibbons Once told me, ‘Spencer, it was time to go when they don’t want to do it right.’ He understands the right way to coach is the only way. When leadership wants less than that because they are controlled by a few parent or the community, it’s time to go, before they lose the love and the kids pick up on it.”

As for what Conley would like to see done about a crirical issue he and others feel has created a wedge between young athletes and coaches, he said all parties involved in the lives of the athlete must assume their rightful role.

“I would like to see coaches coach,” Conley said. “People who care should not be afraid to say, ‘That’s not good.’ All it is from what I see is people rejecting discipline.”

By all accounts, unyielding love and support for the athlete is what coaches are trying to demonstrate, Conley said.

“There are people who understand this message,” Conley said. “Then there are people who think they know what love is, but they don’t. There are tons of people who reject that type of love. It’s not tough love. It’s love. Love will tell you to pull your pants up. Love will tell you No, tell you to stop, sit down, pick it up. People who don’t love you will not tell you that. They will exclude you. Kids need that kind of love. They need to be challenged so they can maximize their potential.”

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Andre Johnson is Founder and Publisher for Making Headline News. A 2000 graduate of the University of Memphis School of Journalism and a former staff reporter the Memphis Commercial Appeal newspaper, Johnson covers the NBA Southwest Division from Dallas, Texas. To reach Johnson, send an email to [email protected]. Also, follow him on Twitter @AJ_Journalist.